Pre-Real in Mazatlán

Where to start? I've just discovered that, on this keyboard, the key for full and semi-colons is what I had to use for the question mark in that first sentence. Though the question mark appears on the neighboring key, that key produces nothing that I can see. This strikes me as a lovely metaphor for the blend (co-occurrence, marriage, interplay, play) of familiarity and surprise I've experienced in my travels so far. Sometimes I feel like the main character in Shaun Tan's exquisite graphic novel, "The Arrival."

For those who want the cliff-note version, I am quite well and extremely happy! 

I am now in Palmas, which is the capital of the inland state of Tocantins, Brazil. This is the third stop of my trip, following Mazatlán (on the western coast of México) and Rio de Janeiro. I am filled with (and sometimes flooded by) emotion. The love, nurturance, support and guidance I receive are so profound, freely given, ongoing and pervasive that I feel like a fish in the ocean of this experience. My mouth is open -- love-water inside, love-water outside, buoyed, suspended, flowing. My gratitude continues to grow and deepen, as does my experience of connection. Each moment is complete and full (without being filled).

In Mazatlán, I visited a friend and her family. I had met E the day of her illegal arrival in Santa Cruz, when her parents (my neighbors) introduced her to me. Her dad explained that she wanted and needed to work on her English, as well as to find a job. In the process of teaching English to E and helping out with the job situation, I came to know and appreciate her intelligence, warmth, strong spirit, humor, readiness for hard work, and loyalty to family and friends. In spite of our age difference (I am 26 years her elder), we became friends.

After several years in the US, E returned to México because her opportunities there (oh! no longer "here" for me as I travel) were so limited, and she wanted to complete her Master's degree in Education. After returning to México, E eventually married O, and they live together with O's 15-year-old son, O-R (O-cito). E teaches part-time at a local University and O owns and operates a successful motorcycle repair shop at which he works long hours.

In early March, E gave birth to beautiful, healthy fraternal twins. E's dad is already back in Mexico, but lives far from E and O. E's mom can't visit because of her illegal status in the US. I find this just incredibly sad, and only one of the hard realities of being an illegal immigrant most anywhere. O's parents live in Mazatlán, as do O's siblings, niece, nephew and other relatives. I stayed with E and O, who graciously picked me up at the airport, and I was given O-cito's room (one of four in the small house -- living room with dining area, tiny kitchen, and two bedrooms). When I said I'd be fine sleeping on the couch, O-cito insisted with a smile that he liked sleeping on the couch and then sneaked out of his bedroom with a laptop to continue nosing around on Facebook and Youtube. He is, among other things, a musician, and he has been working on his group's web site.

I want to clarify here that this is, by US standards, a simple -- even perhaps a poor -- house. The computers are old, and all items in the house continue to be used and cared for until they are completely worthless. "Worthless" has a meaning quite different from that in the US, where things often lose their value when they lose their shine. In this home, things have value as long as they are useful, and they are useful as long as hard work and ingenuity can compensate for diminishing or lost function. E and O have a beautiful home (as well as, I thought, a very lovely house). 

My time in Mexico was spent almost entirely in Spanish, which was wonderful for me and less tiring than I'd expected. During my six days in Mazatlán, I had a chance to learn a great deal about babies, and I moved from feeling like I never held them well to feeling at ease with their ongoing care. It was pure mystery and joy (is that redundant?) to watch them change and develop each day. Baby E (named after her grandmom) is a diminutive girl who appears to have an old soul. Her level of presence and engaged observation is deep. Baby J is a strapping boy who is constantly exploring with his body. E and O are getting very little sleep right now. When I told O I couldn't imagine how he and E stayed upright and continued to function, O pointed to his babies and replied, "They are my batteries."

I had met O when I attended his and E's wedding, but this visit was an opportunity to get to know him. He is wonderful man, and a great partner for E -- intelligent, political and philosophical as well as tender, funny, hard-working and "solid." He is also deeply involved with his babies, which E noted was unusual in México. O's family was extremely welcoming, and it was heartening to experience our increasing comfort and warmth with each other. O-cito was absolutely delightful. He was sweet, funny, inviting and attentive, with none of the posturing I have encountered in some middle-adolescents in the US.

One day, when we were hanging out together, I asked O-cito when he felt most alive. He gave what is, in my experience, a typical teen answer -- "When I'm with my friends, playing music or using the computer." We continued our conversation and he spontaneously shared that he had been going through a difficult time about a month prior, when he discovered a web site that had changed his life. The video was "Say Yes," which as it happens is a central principle of improvisation. O-cito like the video, and he quickly discovered that, by saying "yes" to everything, he was happier and more engaged with the world. He commented on the positive experiences he'd gained by saying "yes." These included experiences prior to his discovery regarding the power of the yes-stance. One of these prior experiences was going to an animé, cartoon and video character Expo at which he'd met his current girlfriend and developed a new group of good friends. Dressed as a character from "Back to the Future," he'd gone to the Expo as the result of losing a bet, only to discover that it was a gift in his life. Needless to say, I knew I was sitting in conversation with one my life teachers.

O-cito invited me to join him and his cousin at this year's Expo (Copa Cosplay Pacífico), which I did. I found it quite enjoyable and fascinating, in spite of my not having much knowledge of the characters depicted by so many participants. The energy was upbeat, the participants varied (e.g., children to elders, most likely every sexual orientation and gender identity, all body types), and the community warm and accepting. Everyone, costumed or not, appeared to be ready to pose for a photo. Many had carefully studied poses that appeared, to my uneducated eye, to derive from specific well-known images. There were professional and home-made shows on the stage, during which participants sang and/or acted out character scenes. When, on occasion, I felt I'd had enough, all I had to do was walk around and I quickly discovered more to engage with and enjoy.

In Mazatlán, much of my time was happily spent sharing the daily activities of the family -- shopping, cooking, cleaning and baby care. However, E and O also treated me to a number of special outings so I could get to know some of this well-known tourist city. Without realizing it, I'd booked my flight to arrive a day before "Semana Santa" (the wild and holy week before Easter), so the downtown area was completely packed with cars and revelers. E and O drove me through so I could get a taste of this experience, but also took me to the wharf (El Muelle), an old plaza (Plaza La Mochada), and an old neighborhood up in the higher part of the city, from which I had a view of the port. In this area (El Mirador), there was also a huge old canon that had been used by the local people in the late 1800s to defend themselves against the invading French. E and I got together one afternoon with a friend of hers, R, whom I'd met at E and O's wedding, and we went out for what may have been the best cup of coffee I've ever had. The deliciousness of this coffee was surpassed only by the depth and breadth of the conversation we three women had, which ranged from babies to culture and politics to women's rights and issues to dreams and hopes.

The architecture of Mazatlán is quite varied, ranging from straight streets lined with small houses in beautiful colors (delicate pastels to rich day-glo), to grand old colonial-style buildings. I was struck by the gated windows, doors and front areas on most houses, which generally looked decorative rather than forbidding or cold. Many houses had gated-in front areas in which there might be only a car, but in which there might also or instead be a cozy sitting area, plants, and art or craft objects. Many houses had sweet balconies, and I was often reminded of the architecture of New Orleans.

The day before leaving California, I commented to a friend that things felt "surreal," and then I riffed, "sub-real, pre-real." During my time in México, my trip still felt pre-real, in that it was like a simple visit to a friend whose wedding I'd attended, and who had now given birth to her babies. This part of my adventure felt comfortable and familiar, in spite of newness and in spite of knowing that this was a beginning to the larger adventure travel. I laughed a lot and, not always knowing why, cried more than once.

meg 4-8-13

My first improvisation with links to photos was unsuccessful as regards allowing people to see the photos, though highly successful as regards allowing me to learn something about the process of linking to Dropbox. I think it will work this time!  (and I know that, if it doesn't, many helpful people will let me know and give me useful suggestions)

El Muelle

https://www.dropbox.com/sh/tb45gw04ewx8w1t/lWccRf9WF0

Cosplay
https://www.dropbox.com/sh/a4bgc8vi85je0u2/pzg3vEbpGT

El Mirador

https://www.dropbox.com/sh/fr9snn9jte51zsb/zj7k96B92l